We have come a long way in a year, but we still have miles to go.  Our current struggle comes from Elly's in frequent bowel movements.  Truth is they have always been irregular, but lately it seems like the Miralax that she takes  on a daily basis isn't cutting it and she has horrible rash that just isn't going away. 

I bit the bullet and called the "Bowel and Bladder department" at our local Children's hospital along with our Myelo Clinic and Urology.  To be honest the last couple of days I have kind of been in a little bit of panic mode, okay well not panic mode, but I really want to find out what the problem is.  I fear the catheter.  I know that it is a medical device that helps SB kiddos, but I just don't want have to deal with it.  Sometimes I fear the unknown, and expressing this seems like I am the worst parent in the world, but I want like any other parent  to know that my kiddo is going to be okay.  She's not sleeping great at night and add teething into the mix and you have a whole list of other problems. 

Other than the bowel problem, her legs seem to be a little stiff and one foot still turns out when she tries to take steps, sometimes even when she has her splints on.  We are thinking that she may need more intensive therapy to help her gain better control over the use of her hips. 

Elly is definitely not the most challenging Spina Bifida case, but it is sometimes difficult for me to deal with it, when my oldest daughter didn't have the challenges that Elly faces. She reached her milestones well before she was suppose too.  I know that every child is different, and develops different but this is still hard  for me.  I know that everything is going to be okay, and that everything happens for a reason.  The only way to look towards tommorrow is to be hopeful.

Najeema